My recent blog about a few “words on a wall”  led me to some interesting prayer times.  As I work to fight off those enemies like doubt, worry, anger and regret, I am reminded while praying of past times God got me through.  Moments in my past when I doubted I would survive a tough day. Moments in my past (usually yesterday) when worry over something clogged my thoughts. Moments in my past when anger clouded my judgement.  Moments in my past when sorrow was overwhelming. Moments – moments – moments.  IN MY PAST – MY PAST – PAST.  

All those moments in my past seemed insurmountable at the time.  Each moment seemed full of insecurities when they were in front of me.  As I struggled to find footing for each difficult event in my past (some just yesterday) I momentarily forgot the last time God led me through a different difficult moment. There have been many. A few much larger than the majority.  When I faced each one though, they felt insurmountable at the time. 

As I spoke words out loud to God one morning I thanked him for his provision during a previous worry – all while also pleading for strength to face my current doubts.  As I was thanking him, I actually joked with him that each of my seemingly insurmountable events would one day be small grains of sand. I told him I was sure he spent moments gently amused by my concerns. He can see how big the pile of sand was under my feet.  When I am spending eternity with HIM I will look back at all my worries, struggles, doubts, and fears as many, many grains of sand that formed my own mountain. 

Each grain of sand is a vital part of my journey. It has been a journey full of the joy Jesus provides in the midst of my needless worry. The moments that seemed very far from joy filled are all grains on the path that leads me up to HIM. While the moments I had to overcome seemingly difficult situations may have felt unending at the time, each one will be completely buried in my mountain of sand when my final step finds me face to face with my Savior some day.   

For now, I  work daily to remember that each grain of sand in my mountain represents a moment of growth. Growth in my life with Jesus. Growth in my relationships with others. Growth in my knowledge that HE holds my hand. Growth in my trust that Jesus will always guide my way. My task is to keep my eyes focused on HIM as I climb up my ever building mountain.  I love when he reminds me of those tiny grains of sand that  are now in my distant past.  I love when he reminds me that he gave me a stronger foothold each time I thought I was sinking in the sand.  I love his daily reminder through his WORD that my irritating grains of sand are making me stronger and stronger.  

“How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand – when I awake, I am still with you.” Psalm 139:17-18